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Remote working is becoming more and more popular ( it;s actually increased 90% over the past 10 years), with employers turning towards flexible work schemes to keep their employees happy and healthy and yet, more and more people feel lonely than ever before. With the advent of working from home is there anything we can do to counteract this?
How can you socialise when working from home? I’ve made a list of 19 steps which will help fight loneliness.
So which of these is the most effective, and is there anything employers can do to support their employees, keep reading to find out more.
(Just a heads up a lot of people reading my blog are in the process of designing their own home office. If you want to save some of the painstaking time I did in designing my office, you can find my recommended products here)
Set up more Skype meetings
One of the biggest issues people who work remotely have is just the lack of facetime. The feeling of being on the outside, away from your colleagues and just not up to speed on the inner working of what’s going on at your company.
Now on top of this, more and more people are living by themselves, with no partners of flatmates to keep them busy..
By having more frequent video conferencing calls every week with your colleagues you’re starting to get the ball rolling or more social interactions, even if they are digital for now.
How to do this
The best way to do this is by starting with one 30 minute catch up every week, either with your team leader or close colleagues. Once you are comfortable, increase this to a few times per week. Back in March 2020 when everyone was working from home consistently we would schedule group video calls to hit multiple births with multiple stones… as grim as that sounds.
What would be the best option
So whilst I’m fond of using free tools like google hangouts for conferencing calls the undisputed grand daddy of video calls would be Skype. Consider their premium platform for the best results possible.
Attempt public speaking
Okay about 90% of you probably just squirmed reading this and have scrolled down to the next item. I don’t blame you, public speaking is hard. I’ve been doing it for a few years and still get terrified just before I go up.
So why am I recommending this when you work remotely. Well, often, when you speak publicly you will not only get out (most likely) of your house and get a chance to network. You’ll also be seen as a thought leader meaning more people will come to you about your certain topic.
Public speaking can be a great way of making friends and doesn’t necessarily have to be related to work all the time.
How to do this
My recommendation to start off would be to do some virtual public speaking gigs. Join a few facebook groups on the topic you’re passionate about or topics relating to your profession. Start small with 3-5 minutes speeches and take it from there. Once you’ve built up your confidence, move to longer public speaking events you can do in person.
What would be the best option
There are loads of great public speaking courses out there that you can find on event bright but for my money the best programs out there are by speakup and Darren Lacroix who is actually an award winning public speaker.
Work remotely with a friend once per week
One of the benefits of remote working being more common is that it’s likely your friends are going to be working remotely at least a few times per month too.
This opens up a bunch of new possibilities… I mean it’s almost like your friends work in the same place you do!
Just make sure you set up some clear guidelines beforehand so that you and your friends don’t get distracted and see it as just a social gathering. Ensure you set up regular breaks for you both to catch up throughout the day and you will be golden.
How to do this
Simply contact all your friends, ask them if they work remotely and if they want to work together and schedule a date. Alternatively feel free to switch the dates with your friends family member to keep things fresh over the weeks.
What would be the best option
Ideally you would want to do this in person but if you are in a completely different part of the country then your friends or you’ve just moved you can set up a Skype call and leave it on in the background whilst you both get on with your day.
Hit the gym on your lunch break
You can only stare at a screen too long. Sooner or later you’re going to have to take out your work frustration and it might as well be the weights!
Getting out and doing any form of exercise is going to work wonders on your body, helping you feel more energised and focused as the day goes on. So why would I suggest going to the gym? Well simply put there are people there. Often it’s not actually speaking to[people we miss but just being surrounded by people so buy going to a public gym you will be ticking this off your list.
How to do this
Simply search up the local gyms in your area and pop inside on your lunch break. Start off small with exercises that are easy and work your way up. To make things a bit more interesting and if you’ve got the funds consider personal training which really can work wonders not only on your mind but your body as well.
What would be the best option
Honestly the best option is whatever is going to keep you going, so if it means going to the gym first thing in the morning then stick with it. You might also want to keep your diet in check using something like my fitness pal to watch what you eat while you workout.
Consider a shared workspace
Shared work spaces are another tool in your proverbial social toolbox to use. I’ve actually got first hand experience with these. A few years ago and they are lovely.
I mean you get to work with a group of like minded people all of whom are driving forward with entrepreneurial spirit. (okay I’m getting carried away a bit)
Shared workspaces can be great ways of getting out of the house a few times a week. It’s worth mentioning though that these can be pricey depending on where you go so opt for free areas instead,
Worse case scenario you can always hop on down to your local library.
How to do this
Simply google shared workspace near me and you should find tons of options, I mean look what I found.
What would be the best option
If you really are struggling, we work and workspace are two fantastic options that don’t necessarily break the bank
Make after work plans
One of the major problems people have when working remotely is that once their work day is done they continue on and stay at home.
I’m no different, ask any of my friends seeing feed on a weeknight is a once in the blue moon type thing. That being said I don’t work from home every day meaning that I get my social fix. I would definitely recommend anyone working remotely everyday to stop working at 5 and get out after work, particularly with friends/family if possible.,
This will not only give you something to look forward to but socialising will also just keep you going for the rest of the week.
How to do this
Simple one really, just drop your friends a message and off you go!
What would be the best option
If you’re really struggling to come up with something fun to do, have a look at Groupon which has tons of great offers to get you out of the office.
Structure your day using the Pomodoro technique
What technique? For any long time readers of the blog you guys know how much I love this.
The basic idea behind it is that for every 25 minutes of work you do, you take a 5 minute break. You then repeat this for an hour and a half period.
It’s been designed to help you focus on project works and one of the reasons why It helps socialise is that at the end of every 25 minutes you get a chance to catch up with someone.
In my opinion part of the reason we feel lonely when working is because we have dead time, it’s only when our minds begin to wonder do we start to have thought of being away from people so by setting this up in advance your training your brain.
Now if your interested in improving your productivity when you work from home, check out this post I wrote about it.
How to do this
Set an alarm on your phone every 25 minutes and then another one for 5 minutes after that, You’ll be shocked at how much work you can do with so many breaks.
What would be the best option
Now if you don’t want to use your alarm for the Pomodoro technique you can download a specific app like Tomato Timer which does the job and keeps it fun at the same time ( it even has a picture of a tree!)
The pomodoro technique is one of the most effective ways of breaking your day down into tasks, keeping you focused and helping you to avoid loneliness
Vary your communication channels
Human beings are creatures of habit. We love to do the same thing over and over again and yet we get frustrated when we do.
Part of the reason why we want t o socialize more when working remotely is because we are just speaking to people using the same methods, whether it be via calls or emails.
You should definitely change things up, what the old saying is, variety is the spice of life and your communication channels are no different. If your meetings are all done via Skype consider adding a bit of flair by using things like house part or Microsoft teams that allow you to play games.
Instead of having one to one calls invest in conference calls, small things like this will help keep things fresh every day.
How to do this
If you take the leads on multiple meetings for the week, change one of them up every week to a different communication channel, if you don’t take the lead suggest it to your boss and make a case for why it’s a good idea.
What would be the best option
As always I would recommend Skype but look into other cool platforms like slack or Microsoft teams which have other functionality to keep things fun.
Don’t just catch up about work
Okay I’m definitely guilty of this sometimes. Don’t get me wrong we all get on with our colleagues but a lot of them are just not as close to us as our immediate friends/family. As such it’s super tempting when you do have hangout meetings to just spend the entire time talking about work stuff.
Why not use the opportunity to get to know the person better, understand what your colleagues like and geet to connect with the theme on a human level?
Heck you could even brainstorm potential business ideas; speaking of which if your interested in finding a few of compiled an exhaustive list you can find here.
How to do this
Best thing I would recommend for this would be to spend the first 5 mins of any conference call just catching up with your colleagues trying to get to know them a bit better. Once you have a level of comfort with them you can set up some time to just catch up about stuff completely non-work related and take things from there.
What would be the best option
Ideally in person but if not possible, Skype is always your friend.
Make time a for lunch break with your colleagues
Again similar to the point above, catching up with your colleagues over lunch is another way to tell loneliness to go and shove it.
A lot of the time we get frustrated just because we’re not taking any breaks, pair this up with being by yourself and your mind will start to wander.
Ensure at least one per week you catch up over lunch – there is an importance of catching up and eating together so ensure you do it too!
How to do this
This is something that you need to take the initiative on. People will likely want to do the same when working remotely but often not take the first step so set up a hangout or Skype meeting for a 30 minutes (not everyone wants to spend their whole hour with other people ) and then take things from there
What would be the best option
Again, the best option would be using Skype
Consider, but don’t rely on social media
Social media is a fantastic tool to help bring you and others closer to others when working remotely.
I mean a few years ago all you could do on Facebook was send an instant chat, we’re now up to live streaming and the future looks like it’s super bright!
Now with all that being said I did hesitate a little to put this on here. Why? Well a lot of social media sites like Instagram for example have actually been shown to have a negative effect on loneliness and can often leave you feeling more isolated.
My suggestion then would be to do something slightly different….
How to do this
When using social media only spend about 5-10 minutes on it with your own friends/scrolling. Instead use social media in a productive way to focus on your hobby.
Into Brazilian jujitsu? Start a YouTube channel! Want to connect with people about being a single mom? Set up a Facebook group or Instagram page.
By doing this you’re starting a conversation instead of just passively scrolling which is likely to do more harm than good.
What would be the best option
My suggestion would be to go down the YouTube spot, however I get that is not for everyone.
Attend networking events
Another great way to get out of the house and socialise whilst also building your career is to attend networking events. You’ll be shocked at the amount of rent that takes place around topics you’re interested in and you will feel a lot better speaking to people who have the same level of interest.
What’s better is you never know who you’re going to meet at networking events with you potentially finding new career opportunities you might not have considered before.
Now I know you might be a little bit nervous about attending a networking event ( i still am!) but keep it simple, instead of pitching to people, try to just have a conversation, ask people what they do for a living and just generally catch up. A lot of people might come across as bad salespeople but just have a chat, you’ll find the people are much more open to having a chat.
How to do this
Start by attending networking events for once a month and state that you will stay for about 30 minutes, you can then gradually increase this as you become more and more confident. You might find that you see the same people again and again at these events.
What would be the best option
Personally I feel as though free networking events are the best option, simply search networking events and your city and you will be presented with a host of options!
Networking can be a great way of meeting like minded people and doesn’t necessarily have to be related directly to your work, simply find something your passionate about and find an event for it.
Consider your EAP programme
So for those of you unfamiliar with the HR landscape you might be asking, Fehed, what the hell is an EAP?
Simply put, an EAP package is an Employee assistance programme. Employers usually set these up for their employees to talk confidentially about issues they are facing. These are usually done over the phone but can end up taking the form of meeting too.
They are great ways of just de-stressing, getting a bit of human interaction and just catching up with another person every once in a while.
It’s worth making a note beforehand of everything you want to discuss and then take things from there.
How to do this
So more often than not, EAPs are provided by their employers and so they will need to be the ones to implement this. If you do work in the HR space, the good news is that there are a ton of good quality benefits and wellbeing providers out there who have EAP programmes in place.
Now once you have a provider in place, simply contact them discreetly, usually through a free phone option and just have a chat for maybe 20 minutes every week to catch up.
The person on the other end is likely to offer up a few options such as therapy, CBT to help
What would be the best option
So I’m going to be a little bit biased but Reward Gateway who are a benefits provider have a great EAP provider in house
Use an existing benefits provider
So similar to the points above, benefits providers have a host of wellbieng and recognition tools to keep you feeling less lonely.
Things like e-cards between colleagues or a bit of friendly competition can all be managed through these platforms, and for remote workers in particular, having a place they can see all the latest company news whilst feeling connected to the firm core values is huge.
I mean let’s say you did a good job on a project and received an e-card from the CEO, it would definitely lift your spirits bright?
How to do this
Against similar to the EAP mentioned above, this would all ( ideally) be handled by your HR team, so feel free to ask about your current benefits offering.
What would be the best option
Once again, Reward Gateway
Work from your local coffee spot
Another great way to socialise is just to work from your local coffee store.
I only started doing this recently but it really does work wonders. At first I was a little nervous, like what if other people look at you , will I be able to focus? The truth is after about 5 minutes none of that stuff matters, Instead come prepared with your tasks for the day and do them.
For example, maybe it’s a day just full of admin stuff with no walls, or it’s just purely focused on copy writing, a day like this can easily be done in a coffee shop.
On top of this like we talked about earlier, often it’s not actually people that you miss, but just being around people and feeling like a part of a wider community.
Go to your coffee shop regularly enough and you’ll become a part of theirs!
How to do this
Start off with one day every 3 weeks working from a coffee shop for a few hours and then slowly increase this over time.
You will also want to do tasks which are relatively straightforward to start off with that won’t distract others. Sorry super busy sales guys, making 50 cold calls from a home office isn’t really going to be the best option!
My recommendation
Whilst any cozy coffee shop will do I would recommend to try and stay local as you will get much more of a community feel to it.
Create a morning and evening routine
A major reason I feel we want to socialise more when working remotely is because of lack of routine. Let’s face it even the best of struggle to focus sometimes.
With lines between home and work shattered, it’s super easy for things to fall off on the wayside with you working well into the night. Setting up a solid morning and evening routine will help put things into perspective.
Now it’s worth mentioning that working from home can have some serious disadvantages. If your interested in reading up more about this I’ve made a post you can find here.
How to do this
Simply make a list in a diary or journal of three things you have to do in the morning before you start work and three things you have to do at the end of the day before you go to sleep. Trial and error is key until you find what works for you and then take things from there.
My recommendation
This journal from amazon is the one I use and it does the job for me!
Start a hobby in work
Another great way to socialise when working from home is by starting a hobby. For example, once a week you could take charge and host a quiz during your lunch break.
There are loads of games that tools that Microsoft teams have like chess that you can also do, you could even start a cheeky videogame football league, but only on your lunch break of course.
It’s likely you’re not going to be working from home all the time, so on the days you are in the office you might even want to consider things like a pampering day or even a bit for office yoga to keep you healthy.
How to do this
Do a quick survey to ask your team what they enjoy, do something that everyone can do ( not everyone drinks) and then start from there, you never know You might have a brand new hobby from them then onwards.
My recommendation
You can’t go wrong with a quiz,you can start with general knowledge or movies but then make it fun by setting up a quiz about your colleagues.
Maintain your work life balance
So we touched on this briefly but you need to make sure you are maintaining your work life balance when working from home. Although you might think you might work less the opposite is true and you might be taking valuable time away from your time.
How to do this
Schedule your day using a calendar, build a routine and make sure you finish when your working hours finish.
If you are only scheduled to work till 5, put in an activity for 5.30 so you have to stop. Your work is always going to be there, you will never have 100% of your work done so learn to be okay with that and take time for yourself.
My recommendations
Set an alarm on your phone when your work day ends., If you have a work laptop, keep it out of sight until the next day. Focus on meditation apps if you really are struggling to keep your mind at ease.
Journal how you feel
Journaling can be a great tool to keep you focused.
One of the reasons I love journaling is for pattern recognition. For example. Let’s say if you feel a little lonely. You might believe that this is just the norm.
But by ranking every day on a scale of 1-10 you can start to notice patterns of your behaviour, it might be the food you’re eating that is making you feel like that or whenever you have a meeting with your boss you feel deflated.
Using journaling to recognise patterns that can help you uncover some problem areas you need to focus on.
How to do this
Get an idea of what your day might look like a week in advance or how many tasks you have to do and then take it from there.
In the morning write down 3 tasks you want to have accomplished and reflect if they were achieved at the end of the day. At the end of the day give yourself a grade an a scale of 1 010 and reflect on these figures once per month
My recommendations:
I use this journal from amazon, it’s simple and does sth job!
Learn how to speak up
Finally, and this one might be a little controversial so bare with me, learn to speak up. At the end of the day your boss/team/wider people you connect with won’t know that you’re struggling until you let them know.
Although it might be embarrassing you need to learn to approach them when you are struggling. It’s not their responsibility to check in with you and often you will need to be the one who makes the first step.
Luckily by following along with some of the steps highlighted here you should be setting yourself up for success.
Final recommendations
Now there are a lot of steps and recommendations in this post but I just wanted to finish off with a few books that I have found useful on loneliness and working from home, as always let me know if you’ve read any of these:
All of which I’ve found useful and can be found on my recommended books page here.
Finally a lot of people reading my blog want to know what products I recommend for a home office/remote working. You can find my recommendations here and learn how I make money whilst working remotely on the side here.
The content on this on this site has been written by Fehed Nicass who has over a decades worth of experience in sales and has worked remotely for the past 2 years.